Let me share a chapter of my love story.
Ten years ago, I was a gal innocently going through the motions of life. I was a high school student, A lister, a nerd (as they say) and just a normal looking person who is wishing for a God-written love story. But the world has its way of teaching us what love is – contrary to what the Bible teaches us in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8 (CEV):
Love is patient and kind, never jealous, boastful, proud, or rude.
Love isn’t selfish or quick tempered. It doesn’t keep a record of wrongs that others do. Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil.
Love is always supportive, loyal, hopeful, and trusting.
Love never fails!
I remember my teacher in my Christian Value’s class talking about the three (3) types of love: Eros, Phileos and Agape. Eros – emphasizing on physical love, Phileos – characterizing love of a friend and/or family, and Agape – which allows us to see unconditional love (an example would be Jesus ^_^). That time, I just want to experience Agape, never fully knowing what the other two may really mean. As time goes by, I come to experience and see the difference of each.
I am just an ordinary girl with no idea about crushes and love. I am consumed with studying, and improving myself as a person. Back then, I hate make up and dressing up. Instead, I find comfort with jeans. It was when I was in third year college that I felt this weird feeling of admiring the opposite sex, feeling giddy just to see him and sometimes getting so tongue-tied when in front of him. Every morning, I would think of him, and every night, I would dream about him. More on the physical type of love, and before I knew it, I had already fallen in love with him.
The danger of this one was that it was rooted in admiration of physical attributes. We became friends, and eventually, became lovers. We were so consumed with each other that we rarely had time to focus on ourselves, and other things important to our life. Eventually, we separated and I was left heartbroken. I was left wondering what went wrong, and if I had chosen wrong.
Time passed by and the search for someone to be with me forever never really left my heart. I focused on other things for the mean time — academics, work, family and friends. They say being single is a gift from God because this is the season where we can give back your talents to our Creator and allow us to enjoy our relationship with Him before our relationship with the one whom He chooses. They are right, because being single allowed me to realize so many things about myself — my likes and dislikes, how I adjust with people and problems, and most especially how I apply what I learned to new things that happen to me. This season is a gift, and I am forever thankful for it.
However, there will still come a time when one would want to enjoy life with someone by their side. I am at that season. But I also know that my God is a big God who knows my needs (and my wants) and I know He will deliver at that right time. It is very hard on my part as I know I am burning with desire to marry, but then, I also know, that if I am not able to enjoy every single moment of my life alone, I also won’t be able to enjoy it with someone else.
Waiting on God is very hard, I can assure you, but it is also a test of faith. A test of patience. A test of trust to the One who will give me that loving person. I am at this time of my life when God prunes a certain part of me because I am impatient and I am a complainer. I am thankful for the web where I can share my thoughts and the thought that I am not alone — that somewhere, someone else feels the same way as I do gives me encouragement. I know I am still a work in progress and this point of my life might be very important for the upcoming season where I’ll enjoy being with God’s choice for me. I don’t know what God thinks, but one thing is for sure – whatever is happening to me right now is what He thinks is the best for me. Maybe, someday, I’ll be spending the rest of my life with my other half, just like this couple below.
So now, maybe we’re on the same boat and you are waiting on God. You might not be waiting for someone special, but you are waiting for God’s provision, or His answer to a specific prayer. My thoughts on that — still, wait on God. He might be lengthening the time being because He wants us to be patient, to trust Him, to have faith in Him more. Whatever that is, remember you’re not alone. We are on the same boat and just believe (as I do right now) that whatever we are waiting for, He is working on it and working something great on us. Just believe. 🙂
One thing I learned about love in the past ten years is this: Love is patient, love is kind. It isn’t selfish or quick tempered. It is always hopeful, and trusting. Love never fails. Even if my first love failed to make me happy, true love will never fail to encourage and give lasting happiness. That is what I learned in the past ten years — that is, love rooted in the physical attributes of this world will never last, but the love rooted in God will last forever and I am willing to wait on that no matter what I feel right now.